Some people aren’t that into getting up in front of other people. Some people are super into it, and ham like they’re hosting a variety show. Regardless of where a student falls on that spectrum, I always encourage my students to perform. It serves them to receive positive feedback from listeners, and it gives their families a chance to express their support and enjoyment of this new skill they are acquiring. It also serves the student to feel the unique stress and excitement of the performance experience. Feeling nervous and pressured, and then getting 'eye of the tiger'-level focus and doing a great job is a unique type of intoxication I would recommend to anyone!
A musical performance also meets some primal need (in my humble opinion!)… there is a possibility that the listeners will all connect to each other through the transcendental experience of hearing the music, and the player will perceive their very important role in leading the audience in this experience. Maybe hearing “This Is Not Yankee Doodle” or “Sailing on the Sea” for the 100th time doesn’t send you to heaven, but I have been moved by performances of young children, beginner adults, and sophisticated teenagers alike. When a student puts their passion and focus into a performance, there is a vulnerability and a level of trust there, that is humbling and inspiring to me as a listener (and as a teacher). This is all part of the journey that we are on together.
I like to have my students take turns hosting recitals as house concerts, rather than using a church or community center. I like the familiarity of it, and the less-stuffy, low-pressure nature of that environment. When I was a kid, I absolutely hated music recitals, so I am doing everything I can to NOT recreate that same experience for my students!! I love for my students (the kid ones at least) to go crazy playing together in the play room, while the adults toast some mimosas upstairs, and then to start the program after everyone is feeling relaxed and friendly. It also feels old-timey and wholesome, hearkening back to a less technological time, when gathering around the piano at someone’s house party was a common practice.